Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts
Driving with wife, drinking, speeding, husband and wife jokes, latest funny message

A man and his wife are driving down the road when a cop pulls them over.

The cop says to the man, "Do you know that you were speeding?"

The man replies, "No sir, I didn't know I was speeding."

The mans wife then yells, "Yes you did, you knew you were speeding I've been telling you to slow down for miles."

"SHUT UP!" the man says to his wife, "Shut the hell up, just sit back and be quite."

Then the cop says, "well, since I've got you pulled over did you know that the tag on your license plate is expired?"

"No Sir" the man replies, "I did not know that"

"WHATEVER!" His wife yells, "I've been telling you to go get it up to date for 2 whole months now!"

"Shut up" the man yells to his wife again! "Sit back and shut up, mind your own business!"

Curios, the cop walks over to the woman's side of the car and asks her, "Does he always talk to you this way?"

"No" she replies, " Only when he's drinking!"

Aaj ka faltu gyan, funny hindi jokes and sms, comedy gyan, funny whatsapp message, latest funny message

उन लड़कों को समर्पित ,,
जो साइज़ जीरो वाली लड़कियों के लिए पागल
रहते हैं ___ ?
प्यार करना है तो दिल से करो,
हड्डियों पर तो कुत्ते भी मरते हैं...

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आज का ज्ञान
सुबह जल्दी 5 बजे
उठने का भी एक बढिया फायदा है,
फ़ोन चार्ज पर लगाकर(वापस सोकर)
आप 8 बजे तक उसकी बैटरी फुल पा सकते है...

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इतिहास गवाह है..
"अलार्म बंद करने के बाद जितनी अच्छी नींद आती है.,
उतनी अच्छी नींद तो रात में भी नही आती..!!"

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ये लड़कियों की फेक आई डी चलाने
बाले
लड़के वही है ..
.
जिन्हें बचपन में बहन की फ्रॉक
पहनने का और
अपनी मम्मी की विंदी लगाने
का शौक चड़ गया था...

-------------------------

दुनिया वाले पूछते हैं :
अधूरे सपने पूरे करने के लिए
क्या करना चाहिए ?
.
.
हमारा जवाब है:
दोबारा सो जाना चाहिए...

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चाहे कितनी भी अंग्रेजी सीख लो परन्तु अगर
.
.
.
कुत्ता पीछे पड़ जाये तो हट्ट-हट्ट ही कहना पड़ेगा...

Marriage joke, married, Girl, latest funny message, jokes on husband and wife

Start class="fbmetaImg bigimg"

Dad : Son you have to get married I have seen a Girl for you
Son : Not possible

Dad : Think twice she is Bill Gates daughter
Son : I m ready.

Dad goes to Bill Gates
Dad : My son wants to marry ur daughter
Bill Gates : Not possible

Dad : Think twice he is the CEO of Swiss Bank
Bill Gates : I m ready

Dad goes to Swiss Bank Authorities
Dad : Make my son the CEO of ur Bank
Authorities : Not possible

Dad : Think twice he is Bill Gates Son in Law
Authorities : Ur Sons job is confirmed


power of wife, woman, shopping, purse, husband, comedy jokes, english jokes, latest funny message


A woman went shopping, At cash counter she opened her purse to pay.

The cashier noticed a TV remote in her purse.He couldn't control his curiosity and asked "Do u always carry ur TV remote with u?"

She replied " No, not always, but my husband refused to accompany me for shopping today..

The story continues....

The shopkeeper laughs and takes back all the items that lady had purchased.

Shocked at this act, she asks the shopkeeper what is he doing.

He said your husband has blocked your credit card.

MORAL : Respect the hobbies of your husband



Story continues....

Wife took out his husbands credit card from purse and uses it to clear all the bills.

Unfortunately he didn't block his own card.

Moral: Dont underestimate the power of a WIFE
Comedy jokes on marriage, boys, love letter, gifts, mobile, whatsapp jokes, facebook jokes, latest funny message


Things in boys room Before Marriage:

Perfumes,
Love letters,
Gifts,
Friendship Bands,
Cards &
Nokia E71

After Marriage:
Painkillers,
Loan papers,
Unpaid bills &
Nokia 1100

Attitude of software engineer, boy and girl jokes, smoking is injurious to health, programmer, warnings, errors, latest funny message

The Boy is smoking and leaving smoke rings into the Air.

The Girl gets irritated with the smoke and says to her lover: "Can't you see the warning written on the Cigarettes packet, smoking is injurious to health!"

The Boy replies back: "Hey, I am a Programmer. We don't worry about warnings, we only worry about errors."

Students life and their moments, comedy jokes on students, friends, teacher, jokes on teacher, latest funny message


Students life and their moments..

Most Irritating Moment : Morning Alarms

Most Dreadful Moment : Way to Class

Most Lovely Time : Meeting Friends

Most Tragic News : Test in 1st period

Most Wonderful News : Teacher is absent

Most Relaxing Area : Last Bench

Most Funny Moment : Teacher cracks a Joke and nobody laughs....

Pati patni joke, ek patni, 2 patni, comedy jokes, pati jokes, patni jokes, comedy jokes, latest funny message


Latest Funny Message



Agar aapki 1 patni hai

Toh vo aapse ladegi.

Magar aapki 2 patni hain

Toh vo aapke liye ladegi....

Feel the diffrence

(Sender not responsible, Try at your own risk)

Husband and wife joke, before marriage, after marriage, comedy jokes, latest funny message


Before Marriage:

Husband : Yes! atlast it was so hard 2 wait

Wife : Do you want me 2 leave?

Husband : No! don't even think about it

Wife : Do you love me ?

Husband : Ofcourse! over n over!

Wife : Have u ever cheated on me?

Husband : No!y r u even asking?

Wife : Will u go on wid me on picnic?

Husband : Every chance I get!

Wife : Will u hit me ?

Husband : R u crazy?I'm not that kind of person!

Wife : Can I trust u?

Husband : Yes..

Wife : My Sweet Darling!



After Marriage:
Now simply read from bottom to top

Latest Funny Message

#Positive #Attitude #Jokes
Doctor vs engineer jokes, love, girl, rose, apple, commedy, funny, jokes, latest funny message

Latest Funny Message


A Doctor and an Engineer both loved the same girl

Doctor everyday gives her a Rose.

Engineer gives her an Apple daily.

Doctor asked why?

Engineer said 'An apple a day keeps the Doctor away.''!!!!

Jokes, winter, bsnl, sonu, monu, signal, thandi, latest funny message, funclub







Funny jokes on bhabhi, comedy jokes, faadu jokes, bhabhi, patakha, #funclub, #latestfunnymessage

#LatestFunnyMessage

कुछ बच्चे सड़क पर अपने पटाखे जला रहे थे..
अभी एक पटाखे में चिंगारी लगाई ही थी की
सामने से हमारी भाभी आती दिखी . .
सब चिल्लाने लगे ...
भाभी पटाखा है ...
भाभी पटाखा है ...
भाभी पटाखा है ...
भाभी मुस्कराई और बोली :." नही रे पगलो ,
अब पहले जैसी बात कहां।।।

Faadu jokes on pati and patni, hindi jokes on pati and patni, comedy jokes on pati and patni, comedy jokes, funclub, funny jokes, latest funny message


बीवी – सुनो जी, जब हमारी नयी नयी शादी हुई थी,
तो जब मैं खाना बना कर लाती थी तो तुम खुद कम खाते थे,
मुझे ज्यादा खिलाते थे।
संता - तो ?
बीवी - तो अब ऐसा क्यों नहीं करते ?
संता - क्यूंकि अब तुम अच्छा खाना बनाना सीख गयी हो....

----

Pati Aur Biwi Me Ladai Ho Gai
Pati Ghar Se Chala Gaya.
Raat Ko Phone Karke Pucha Khane Me Kya He?
Biwi: Hathi ka anda
Pati: Mei Der Se Aaunga,tum Kha Kar So Jaana.

Gabbar and sambha comedy jokes, faadu  comedy jokes, bollywood comedy jokes, latest comedy jokes, whatsapp comedy jokes, facebook comedy jokes, funclub, latest funny message

Gabbar And Sambha Comedy Jokes


गब्बर: कितने आदमी थे?
सांभा: सरदार दो।
गब्बर: मुझे गिनती नहीं आती, दो कितने होते हैं?
-
सांभा: सरदार दो, एक के बाद आता है।
=
गब्बर: और दो के पहले?
-
सांभा: दो के पहले एक आता है सरदार।
-
गब्बर:तो बीच में कौन आता है?
-
सांभा: बीच में कोई नहीं आता सरदार।
-
गब्बर: तो फिर दोनों एक साथ क्यों नहीं आते?
-
सांभा: एक के बाद ही दो आ सकता है क्योंकि दो, एक से बड़ा है सरदार।
-
गब्बर: दो, एक से कितना बड़ा है।
-
सांभा: दो, एक से एक बड़ा है सरदार।
-
गब्बर:अगर दो, एक से एक बड़ा है तो एक, एक से कितना बड़ा है?
-
सांभा: सरदार अब आप मुझे गोली ही मार दो
-
मैंने आप नमक ही खाया है च्यवनप्राश नही।

Beta reading sms, jokes of the day, comedy jokes, hindi jokes, faadu jokes, whatsapp jokes, whatsapp jokes of maa and beta, jokes for whatsapp, funclub



MAA : Beta Kya Kar Rahe ho ?

BETA : Padh Raha Hun!

MAA : Excellent !

Kya Padh Rahe ho ?

BETA : Aap Ki Hone Wali Bahu Ke Messages

Flying chappal recieved at 140kmph*



Great indian mother, comedy jokes, jokes of the day, faadu comedy jokes, google, ceo, jokes, Aunty, sarkari naukri jokes, google jokes, CEO jokes, funclub

Great Indian Mother (Jokes of the day)

Indian Mother

Journalist: Apka Beta Google Ka CEO ban Gya Hai Aunty Apko Kaisa Lag raha Hai?

Maa: Theek Hai!! Lekin Thodi Mehnat Aur Kar Leta To Sarkari Naukri Lag Jati

Submit Your Jokes

To make this blog a successful blog visitors, I need your part on this blog. Kindly share your amazing jokes with us & we will put on our JOKES OF THE DAY section.

Submit Your Jokes

Facebook faadu comedy jokes in hindi, faadu jokes, comedy jokes, whatsapp faadu jokes, facebook faadu jokes, hindi comedy jokes, facebook and whatsapp funny jokes, facebook ke jokes, funclub

#Facebook #Whatsapp Faadu #Comedy #Jokes In Hindi | Funclub

Gabbar : Kitne Aadmi the ?
Kalia : Sarkar 1
Gabbar : Aur tum ?
Kalia : 100


Gabbar : fir b wapas aa gaye woh b khali hath,
kaun tha woh ?
.
.
kalia : RAJNIKANT.

Gabbar : Oops ! sorry bhai…

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Shadi me dulhan ko ghunghat me kyun rakha jata hai..???
.
.
.
.
.
Nahi pata.
.
.
.
.
.
Taki kisi k muh se ye na nikal jaye.
Abe ye to meri wali thi….

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Ek pagal tha,
Itna pagal tha,
Bilkul pagal tha,
Jabardast pagal tha,
Bahut khatarnak pagal tha,
Lekin Aap mat ghabrao
.
.
.
Aapke samne to wo kuch b nhi tha

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Duniya k saare dard ek taraf
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Aur slow internet chalne ka dard ek taraf....

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Ek driver ki seat ke piche likha tha
.
.
.
.
.
Agar Khuda ne chaha to manjil tak paucha doonga,
.
.
.
.
.
agar nazar chuki to Maa Kasam,
Khuda se he mila doonga . .. !

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Teacher : Complete the sentence..
.
.
.
.
"Early to bed and early to rise.."
.
.
.
.
.
.
Student : This Man has no interest in his wife…

--------------------------------

Why I hate CID...
Example
LADY : Rahul Mera Bhai Tha
DAYA : Kya ? Rahul Tumhara Bhai Tha ?
LADY : Haan, Rahul Mera Bhai Tha
ABHIJEET : Rahul Sach me Tumhara Bhai Tha ??
LADY : Ha Sir...Wo Mera Bhai Tha
ACP : My God, Iska Matlab, Tum Rahul Ki Behen Ho…

jokes of the day in hindi, boyfriend girlfriend jokes, comedy jokes, facebook comedy jokes, faadu facebook jokes, hindi comedy jokes, funclub

#Jokes Of The Day #Boyfriend #Girlfriend #Jokes

Boy:" kya tum hamesha mere
sath rehne ka waada kar sakti ho ??
.
Girl:" haan..
.
.
Boy:" mujhe kabhi chhod ke nahi jaogi ??
.
Girl:" nahi..
.
.
Boy:" kya kya kar sakti ho mere liye ??
.
Girl:" jo bhi tum bolo
.
Boy:" mujhe kabhi shikayat ka mauka nahi
dogi
.
Girl:" kabhi nahi..
.
.
Boy:" kya chahiye tumhe mujhse ??
.
.
Girl:" 1000 per month
.
Boy:" thik hai kal se kaam pe aa jana jhadu
aur baki safaai ka
saman kharid lena..
.
.
.
Girl:" ji saab, ab mai chalti hoon..
.
.
.
aur aap soch rahe the ki girlfrnd itni acchi
kabse ho gayi.. ??

Rajnikant and kattappa comedy jokes, faadu comedy jokes, hindi jokes, rajnikant jokes, kattappa jokes, faadu whatsapp jokes, rajnikant kattappa joke, funclub


Lo ji pehli baar Rajnikant par koi bhari pada hai

रजनीकांत और Kattapaa की मुलाकात हो जाती है ---

रजनीकांत ~ मेरे गाँव में लाइट नहीं थी, मैं अगरबत्ती जलाकर उसकी रौशनी में पढ़ता था।

Kattapaa ~ हमारे गाँव में तो बिजली भी नहीं थी और हमारे पास अगरबत्ती के पैसे भी नहीं थे, फिर भी मैं पढ़ा।

रजनीकांत~ कैसे ?

Kattapaa~ मेरा एक दोस्त था प्रकाश, उसे पास बिठा कर पढता था। एक दिन प्रकाश भीग गया वो नहीं आया फिर भी मैं पढ़ा ।

रजनीकांत ~ कैसे?

Kattapaa~ गाँव में ज्योति नाम की लड़की भी तो थी । उसके पास बैठ कर।

रजनीकांत बेहोश।